My Guts Turned Inside OutI went to Zac's wrestling tournament today... Guess who was there?? Chris of course. When I got there I had the feeling that I would have another miserable day just because I would have to look at him..but I was determined not to let it show. But then he looked at me..and he kept looking at me..and then he smiled really big and winked at me. If it were any other guy it wouldn't have meant nearly as much..I miss him so much. I can't take it. Everyone keeps trying to tell me that maybe he misses me too.. but something this good won't happen to me. I still love him more than anything. I am just about to the point that I would do anything just to be near him...just one more kiss or one more glance..
He is the first guy that I really don't want to make fun of or try to hurt....he was a blessing. And I ruined it. If I hadn't been so ill all of the time..even when I hadn't had much sleep. If I would have played along when he tried so hard to make me happy.. If I would have just tried harder than I did..God it is all my fault.. Oh I miss him so much. Dammit. I love him. He makes my heart break into every time he smiles at me. Maybe one day he will come back to me.. I have to wait on him.
I guess I should just be thankful that we are at least talking..and not at each other's throats like me and all of my other boyfriends have been.
He was always different.. I knew it from the time I met him..from the first time our eyes met and he winked at me.. no words..just eyes..and they say a thousand words..that was all I needed..just one look. I miss him holding me and us watching Spongebob and the way he whispered how much he would love me until the end of time. I'll never watch spongebob again. I think of him and I put all of the cards away..and the ring is back in its box..the watch got stolen..but the memories remain. I wish they would go and leave me the hell alone. I want to sleep again. His face is everywhere..and i've found myself thinking that I like other guys just because things about them remind me so much of him..but he's all I want.
Damn this entry is too long and too whiny.
Bye now,cause i'm getting pissed at myself for even writing this..
~Hanna
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Try to shake things up a bit when things get too repetitive
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There is only one sure means in life of ensuring that you are not ground into paste by disappointment, futility and disillusion and that is always to ensure, to the utmost of your ability, that you are doing it solely for the money.
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My enemies are without Honor. I bring them only Vengeance.. and Death.
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X My Pretty Corpse X
'love is dead and withered like a rose'
Run! Hide yo money! If you are a male keep yo pants zipped!
and i just thought i would say a hello and to let you know that i miss you!
love always,
~Britt
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X My Pretty Corpse X
'love is dead and withered like a rose'
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Etsy Shop / My Blog
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+SiN
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in this world theres real and make beleive,
this seems real to me,
you love me but you dono who i am,
im torn between this life i lead and where i stand,
you love me but you dono who i am,
so let me go, just let me go
~3 doors down
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check out my gal. its full of serpents, shroomies, and otha weird shiz like that- thankyou
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